THE MAKING OF A MOTHER

As I embody the inner transformation to Motherhood, I am finding new ways to be. Today is week 36 of getting to facilitate new life. I am celebrating this journey, by diving deeper into the experience of becoming the mother I want to be. Honored to be sharing with you, I hope you feel permission to share your experiences too.

I've discovered my term of pregnancy has been about learning how to Mother Me - before I evolve and become a Mother to our little one.

I wonder, what does it mean to you to be a mother? - Please share, we have so much more that unites us than we even know.

I ask myself, what have I let go of in the last eight months to create space for this new version of me?

What new approaches to life have I taken, what new ways do I see?

And how have I loved and supported myself through this challenging yet deeply beautiful journey?

And so I share … 

As this little seed embedded taking root to grow, I re-realized just how precious life really is and just how much I now had to lose. Riding the waves of risk and faith, I found myself relieved and grateful with each passing week - as baby continued to thrive inside of me. 

With vast new territory ahead, I decided to trust the unexpected interests arising within me. Curious to know more about the body and gestation process, I signed my husband and me up for a Natural Birth course online. We made it a ritual every two weeks to sit down and dive in, preparing ourselves gently for what was to come. With his openness by my side, I felt unified and supported; we were growing our family together.

Between the weeks that brought my husband and me together for deliberate preparation, days would go by giving mini opportunities for personal transformation. I found myself facing strong emotions, with the ability to choose how kind and open to myself I would be. I found myself wishing to let go of superficial aspects of daily life, to re-member what mattered. Conditioned housekeeping habits became less critical as I was training myself to give more love and care to the inner needs of myself, husband, and extended family. 

Self-care practices like trusting and acting on my desires became non-negotiable. If I felt the urge to paint, cook, bathe, write, photograph, reach out to a fellow sister, explore - embark on wacky adventures... I let myself. Simply that it felt right became enough reason to pursue whatever it was that day I needed to do. It was in these moments of embodied experience where the noise and responsibilities of life faded away, and I reconnected to the truth of my being. Following this inner voice often lead to a deeper connection and bond to the blossoming baby inside of me. After acting upon these inner inklings, I returned to a state of lifted energy and peace.

To deepen into the experience of carrying a new life became the underlying daily drive. How can I be transformed into who I need to be? 

Never had I ever had the capacity to understand the inner workings of making a mother. I would see the love and connection between mother and child - appreciating the depth and the beauty but knew little about all it took to get there. I am so honored to know this piece of being a woman.

My feelings, thoughts, and actions were no longer just affecting and creating my experience - they were directly influencing this pure, untouched baby. It was time for radical responsibility. Awareness, healing, and clearing not only for the betterment of me but now for the whole of our family. 

Seeing my body take new shape was like sailing the ocean waves—moments of light and unwavering ease, followed by feeling heavy unstable and ill-equipped. I wanted to let go of this superficial attachment to what I believed was the most beautiful manifestation of my body so that I could see through untainted eyes the changing reflections of beauty before me.

I was noticing how unhindered by bodily discomfort I was when I chose to move, be outside, and eat whole and clean food. I was trading in immediate pleasure for delayed gratification. Not only for my thriving abilities but by knowing my choices were now imprinting on our baby. 

I began to dive into the emotional triggers that I unexpectedly faced. Instead of tendencies to blame and control outer circumstance, I took a more inner reflective stance. Moving through the intense sensations, thoughts, and feelings as I tuned in, felt, and breathed. Healing my childhood wounds, I didn't realize I was carrying became so important. I wanted to free myself and my child from carrying their weight.

I began observing a tendency to push growth upon my husband; I wanted to give him space to evolve at his own pace accepting and loving him unconditionally for who he really is - dissolving my inclination to push him into who I thought his best self could be. 

I started valuing my desires and voice enough to make deliberate time for shared connection, play, and bonding with my husband. Our foundation is where this family will grow from; its strength and stability need continuous nourishment. I traded assuming and forcing, which often lead to disappointment for asking and surrendering, which began to lead to fulfillment. 

Choosing to be vulnerable with my emotions and feelings in front of my family became normal - without thinking, I needed to run and hide so I could tuck them away. I want to create a culture in our home, were experiencing a full spectrum of emotions is okay. Where we can sit together in the discomfort until they pass, showing our unconditional love and support no matter what each of us is experiencing. Where we don't need to conceal what we are really experiencing behind a mask.

These are some of the significant shifts I've experienced in the past 36 weeks. I hope you can feel a tidbit of relief in knowing you aren't alone in whatever it was you went through, are going through - or are preparing for. We can come together in our journeys rather than feel we need to hide away and that there is something wrong with us for feeling forms of disarray. 

If there is a transition you are embodying in your life, I would love to help you dive in and uncover its beauty. 

If your family is experiencing a period of extraordinary growth, I would love to sit beside you and preserve it as it unfolds.

Please feel welcomed to book a complimentary call, click in the link below.

A POEM:
The inner landscape of The Mother

She sees you for who you really are

She loves you without earning.

She reminds of your capacity, your gifts … your truth

She always believes in the very best of you.

She breeds abundance, making time standstill

She listens with open ears + lingers if you will

She grows through you as you inspire + help her see

She reminds you that you were born worthy.

She helps you know that you are already whole enough + complete.

Sing your song loud, free your body + bless the earth with your feet

She'll catch you when you fall.

And nourish you until your ready to dive back in.

She hopes someday you'll know.

All the gifts that you've given

For all, it may seem she's been raising you —

But you've awakened in her life's meaning come true.

A BLESSING:

My wish for you, dear Mother to be, Mother, Grandmother …  dreaming of being a Mother.

That you may know the gifts within your heart and soul

That you may see your deeply innate inner beauty, feel empowered + worthy of your every desire. 

All My Love